Bleacher Report

“You a white whore!”

Those were the words that got my attention first also perking the ears of my twelve year old daughter who was sitting right next to me.

“Ugh! Shut the fuck up!”

“You a FAT white whore! Let’s go to the parking lot. I’ll (unintelligible) at your car!”

“SHUT UP! I wasn’t even talking to you but you have to open your mouth and start….” *makes a yak-yak talking motion with her hand*

“You a fat, white whore. I’ll see YOU after the game.” Looks down at the child next to her,  whose approximate age is four, maybe five, and points. “Yeah…you hear that fat white woman right there. Mmm hmmm.”

“Fine with me. Let’s go. Why are you even in the middle of this? I wasn’t even talking to you. Shut the fuck up.”

The white woman looks over at a brave fan who was asking them to remember where they are. “I’m trying but she won’t shut the fuck up.”

Where were they? A kid’s football game.

There were more nasty words exchanged, repeated promises of meeting in the parking lot, blah, blah, blah….and then it ended as suddenly as it started.

**I feel that I have to put this disclaimer in so as not to seem racist or anti-redneck, because I am neither.  The devil is in the details. Yes, it was a black woman and a white woman of redneck persuasion (which I point out not to be politically incorrect but because it’s true). **

These women are in the stands of my son’s first tackle football game and talking trash at one another, threatening violence, and it all started because the white redneck woman made a joke to one of the water carriers on the field and for whatever reason it offended the the black woman.

It was ugly.

And it was sad.

I don’t care about the color of their skin. I don’t care about their lifestyle. I don’t care about how they dress, what kind of car they drive, or where they live.  I don’t care about what they had for breakfast and I don’t care if they use paper or plastic.

I do care that two grown women decided to have a loud, ridiculously uncalled for argument filled with obscene words and hate speech in the bleachers at my son’s football game. I feel safe in assuming that they were there for sons or other family members of their own.

The bleachers were full of kids of all ages. There were parents, grandparents, and family friends. As an avid observer, I couldn’t help but look around and notice the looks on the faces of others. Some were amused. Some seemed embarrassed. Some were frustrated or angry.

The only thing that kept me from telling them to take their childish bullshit to the parking lot and just get ‘er done was the fact that I’ve never been a fan of getting beat up and, at the age of 46, I don’t run as fast as I used to. Then there is the whole ‘want to set a good example for my children’ thing.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not perfect and my kids are not naive to the colorful words (although ‘whore’ was not one I really wanted to explain). It was the vile and hateful words and very public show of ignorance and inconsideration that bothered me the most.

Wrong time, wrong place, ladies (a term I use loosely) but, truly, there isn’t a right time or right place for that behavior. Ever. Except prison. Maybe.

It is my belief that sports programs for kids are to promote exercise, fun, teamwork, and good sportsmanship. It’s fantastic family time. Nothing gets under my skin more than grown people at kids’ sporting events that can’t behave. These women were just two more on a long list of adults acting like idiots at the many, many kids’ sports events I have attended.

I have seen men go at women, women go at men, men go at men, and women go at women. I have heard coaches yelling at players for their own just plain stupid play calls and then watched those kids hang their heads in shame. I’ve seen coaches throw hats and clipboards and on one occasion, I shit you not, a coach throw himself on the ground in the end zone at a 6U flag football game. 6U is, you may have guessed, 5 and 6 year old children.

I think maybe some of us have forgotten why we’re there in the first place.

I get it….I like to win, too. Seriously, does anyone like to lose?

I don’t like everyone in the stands. I mean, who likes everybody? Some people are just plain obnoxious but I live by the philosophy  ‘Not my circus. Not my monkeys.’, not to mention ‘Karma is a bitch.’ If it is my circus or my monkeys, well….I like to think I would act like an adult.

It’s you who thinks you’re at the Superbowl or you own the field. It’s you who thinks your kid is going to earn a full scholarship to his or her (our your) college of choice based on their performance in this one game.

These are kids, people. They are watching. They are learning. And, yes, they are emulating. They just want to have fun, hang with their friends, and play a game.

So please fucking behave.






photo credit: via photopin (license)